Bathers' Blog

Get a life you idiots

2009-11-20T10:20:00.002Z

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8366133.stm

Movember Day 17

2009-11-17T22:13:00.000Z

Movember Day 16

2009-11-17T22:10:00.000Z

Movember Day 15

2009-11-17T22:09:00.004Z

Today you get to rate my Mo....who needs clothes!

Movember Day 14

2009-11-17T22:09:00.000Z

Doh, forgot to take one. To much booze.

Movember Day 13

2009-11-17T22:08:00.000Z

Movember Day 12

2009-11-12T22:54:00.000Z

Movember Day 11

2009-11-12T22:52:00.000Z

Movember Day 10

2009-11-10T21:03:00.000Z

Movember Day 9

2009-11-09T22:13:00.000Z

...Getting there!

Movember Day 8

2009-11-09T22:12:00.000Z

Movember Day 7

2009-11-09T22:09:00.003Z

Movember Day 6

2009-11-09T22:09:00.000Z

Movember Day 5

2009-11-09T22:07:00.000Z

Movember Day 4

2009-11-09T22:06:00.000Z

Movember Day 3

2009-11-04T19:39:00.000Z

http://uk.movember.com/mospace/213449

Movember Day 2

2009-11-03T19:11:00.000Z

http://uk.movember.com/mospace/213449/

Movember Day 1

2009-11-02T23:47:00.000Z

OK, well technically day 2...but I forgot to shave on the 1st!

Interest rates down to 0.5%?

2009-03-05T15:47:00.003Z

Great. Another little gift for those already lucky enough to own a house.

What about the rest of us (those people who live in Central London, earn decent money and rent!)?

We're already spending everything we earn so discouraging us from saving won't make a difference (it's also not going to make me try harder to earn ore cash because there aint much I can do with it when I get it!).

I also can't buy a house...the banks won't pass on the lower rates and need a massive deposit from me (which I don't have because I haven't saved and am not likely to want to save as you've buggered up the interest rates!).

If you want me to spend more how about reducing what you take off me in income tax? I can guarantee that any extra I get will be spent - probably on booze so that might help all of these small pubs you're so keen on fucking over.

Quite frankly. You guys (the Government) fucked up the economy in the first place. What makes you think that trying to fix things is going to help? I imagine there's way more chance it's going to make things worse.

How about you stop meddling and let us get on with it.

Day 4

2009-02-05T07:50:00.001Z

Day 2

2009-02-05T07:49:00.001Z

What?

2009-01-19T21:49:00.002Z

Radio 4? Ever considered giving it a go? The comedy can be good...but...erm...hang on...what's this? Old people talking about how Porn is "ruining" the world?

Hmm.

How about talking about poverty or people carrying guns or the guy in the blue van who cut me up on the bike while smoking a spliff this evening...

Porn? For fuck sake.

"Will....that's not his real name....WAS a teacher...his voice has been changed".

Please tell me this is a joke?

"Jason....another USER..."

Come on BBC. You're not the Daily Mail.

Why is it that the only place I have to vent this kind of frustration with prudish losers is on a fucking blog!?!

Blimey.

"Jason....who now says he's RECOVERED..."

Jason....get a life!

BBC NEWS | UK | 'No God' campaign draws complaint

2009-01-08T22:34:00.000Z

Genius! Pure genius.

Ignoring the fact that the "probably" guarantees no complaint will be upheld I would really love to see the ASA going ahead with the investigation and finding that there is no evidence at all for the existance of "God" so therefore the statement is not only "probably true" but in fact...TRUE.

BBC NEWS UK 'No God' campaign draws complaint

Not that Religious nuts would listen of course. That's the problem with ideology and brain washing really. Can't talk sense into crazy people.

God doesn't exist. Legally anyway

2008-10-22T18:51:00.000+01:00

"But Senator Chambers, a law school graduate, thinks he's found a hole in the judge's ruling.
He said: "The court itself acknowledges the existence of God. A consequence of that acknowledgement is a recognition of God's omniscience."

I disagree. I should think this case highlights a change in the American courts' standpoint regarding the existance of God.

Great stuff.

Legal case against God thrown out - Yahoo! News UK

Call for creationism in science AKA Bullshit talked by twat taken seriously by idiots.

2008-09-12T13:04:00.000+01:00

I don't think I'll even bother adding a comment to this bullshit...

BBC NEWS Education Call for creationism in science

Linux?

2008-09-05T10:03:00.000+01:00

Sums it up really.

Linux is interesting and worth a play around with....but quite frankly: It's shit. Stick to Windows.

BBC NEWS Technology Getting to grips with Linux

DJs criticised for drink comments or "Billy-no-mates researcher does research into crap because nobody will invite them out for drinks".

2008-09-05T09:56:00.000+01:00

BBC NEWS Health DJs criticised for drink comments

Some people really need to get out more...literally. As a direct result of this study I have decided to steer clear of the shandies tonight and shall be having myself a whole heap of top strength lager.

Radio presenters need to say things that their listeners can relate to and find entertaining. Most people (certainly in the UK) enjoy a drink and know that a good night out is generaly accompanied by a few drinks. This is just the way it is...and no, it's not any different in other parts of Europe or the world (that drink that is. In the others they live a dull and tedious life following some fairy tale or other about some imaginative thing that rules the world. But that's another issue altogether. Don't get me started on religion).

People in this country drink too much...that's a fact. But it's not "talking about it" that makes people drink more.

Really wish fucking 'do-gooders' would just leave the rest of us alone to enjoy our lives. You're clearly jealous of the fact that some of us manage to have a good time on a weekend - it's called having friends. You should try it sometime.

BBC flights spending 'frivolous'

2008-09-03T13:21:00.000+01:00

This wouldn't be a politician trying to deflect attention from MPs own pointless spending would it? Considering Norman Baker was ranked 6th in terms of "Incidental Expenses Provision" in 2006/07 this seems a little rich.

Or maybe he's jealous of the travelling BBC staff get to do considering he only managed to spend £5,576 in 2006/07 on travel.

BBC NEWS Politics BBC flights spending 'frivolous'

The value spent by the BBC on travel may be a lot but considering that the BBC has an obligation to report from all over the world it's not exactly surprising. The MP for Lewes (where?), on the other hand, has no such obligation I'm sure.

Who needs the Isle of Wight Festival anyway!

2008-04-03T14:39:00.001+01:00

Sign me up for the 2009 "Frozen Dead Guy Days" festival. Sounds awesome!

http://www.nederlandchamber.org/FrozenDeadGuyDays/

Beer up 4p a pint?

2008-03-12T13:33:00.002Z

A recent headline stated "Beer is cheaper than water". In fact, I think you'll find that "water is more expensive than beer" is a more accurate headline (why the hell is water so expensive in this country!?). People don't drink too much in this country because of the price of booze (it's certainly not cheap as it is) - they drink too much because:

1) Pubs are geared up to make people drink as much as possible (and I don't mean happy hours!) - music is too loud, there are no tables to sit and have a nice chat, soft drinks are more expensive than beer, tea/coffee is unavailable or too expensive etc etc
2) Britain is bloody boring - what else have we to do (go to the cinema? - can anyone actually afford to?)
3) Restricted licensing laws glamorise alcohol and force a "damn, it's closing time so better get the drinks in" attitude.

Sweden (for example) is an expensive country and still has a drink problem similar to that in the UK. In Iceland the prices are so high in bars that people drink as much as they can before they leave the house (classic binge drinking) which means that by the time they reach the pubs they're already too drunk (anyone who's been a student knows how this works!). Restricting something glamorises it - let alcohol be part of "normal" society and people won't get so hooked up on it. Make it possible for people to have a "few pints" without breaking the bank and they're more likely to stick to just a few - On more than one occasion I've thought "well, I may as well drink a skinful if I'm going to pay for a beer". And for those who don't want to drink alcohol, give them a cheaper choice - £2 for a coke is just plain wrong. Why drink a soft drink when you can have an alcoholic one for the same price (and NO, the answer to this is not raising the price of alcohol but DROPPING the price of soft drinks!)

Who ya gonna call?

2008-02-19T17:35:00.001Z

Tuuurdddbusters of course..

Worst train station in the world...

2007-12-24T14:13:00.000Z

Up until just now i would have said mostar...but i can now say the award goes to chester. What a shit hole this place has become! A big ugly shit fest of turd. Waste of fucking space. On which note...arriva trains wales can go Fuck themselves too. Have they just got one engine that does all the routes? This is supposed to be the DEVELOPED world!

----  Sent using a Sony Ericsson mobile phone

Lighter Nights

2007-10-31T14:51:00.000Z

Usually I'm a stickler for tradition (keep the pound etc etc) but I think it's about time we scrapped GMT (for Britain at least). I couldn't give a monkey's if it's dark in the mornings...I want lighter nights!

Not only will this save energy (people not needing as much artificial light in the evenings) it will also boost productivity and ensure people are more cheerful!

So, if you agree (if you don't you're probably some shitty subsidy loving farmer) then sign this:
http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/lighternights/

Blimey!

2007-10-11T12:29:00.000+01:00

Enough said really (men will no doubt give the same response as me while women will simply be impressed).

http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/diet.fitness/10/03/weightloss.kelly.pless/index.html

Understand the English language?

2007-09-07T13:01:00.000+01:00

Well, if not don't go to Wikipedia for help:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noun

"In linguistics, a noun or noun substantive is a lexical category which is defined in terms of how its members combine with other grammatical kinds of expressions. Since different languages have different inventories of grammatical categories, the definition of noun will differ from language to language. In English, nouns can be defined as those morphological stems that form words which can co-occur with (in)definite articles and attributive adjectives, and function as the head of a noun phrase."

Elitist shite. How the fuck is anyone who doesn't have a basic grasp of the English language supposed to understand that crap?

Makes me think of: http://www.plainenglish.co.uk/

What's this you just sent me?

2007-08-10T09:42:00.000+01:00

10th of August. 09:40.

Phone rings (it's Mikey B).
Me: "Hello..............hello?"
Mikey B: "Awright. What's this thing you've just sent me?"
Me: "I've not sent anything. What is it?"
Mikey B: "I'm sure it's from you. It's on my phone. Like a clock thing with your name next to it"
"Mike, that's a reminder on your phone to wish me happy birthday".

Classic.

Always the pessimist...

2007-07-27T12:42:00.000+01:00

Has nobody considered that maybe this cat is actually *causing* these people to die - perhaps through some respiratory illness/complication or something?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/6917113.stm

Chef's salty balls...

2007-06-18T14:59:00.000+01:00

A few lines you wouldn't expect to see on bbc.co.uk:

She pulled off his left testicle and tried to swallow it, before spitting it out. A friend handed it back to Mr Jones saying: "That's yours."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/4253849.stm

The award for stupid bint of the month goes to

2007-05-11T15:16:00.000+01:00

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/south_west/6646331.stm

Here's an atist's impression of the scene:

First one to spot the obvious mistake wins an empty Yazoo bottle.

Save our Boozers!!

2007-04-30T14:31:00.000+01:00

There's nothing more upsetting than seeing another pub closing down (think Intrepid Fox or the Marquis of Granby) or converted into some gastro-pub or, worse still; a "bar".

To prevent one of London's finest pubs from closing sign this petition:
http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/SavetheNell/

It's about time the nasty little suit wearing developers were told where to go. Pubs are fun. Flats are not.

Also worth a visit: http://savetheboozer.blogspot.com/

Test

2007-04-23T13:59:00.000+01:00

NEWS!!!!

2007-04-13T16:54:00.000+01:00

Wales:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/north_east/6548625.stm

Utter crap. How does that make the BBC website?

I could probably do this

2007-04-05T14:29:00.000+01:00

..If I wasn't such a fat wimp.

Not a bad shot for a mobile phone though.

How to sort your life out...

2007-03-30T13:30:00.000+01:00

www.videojug.com

Videos telling you how to do pretty much anything - made by British people too, so it isn't crap.

Today I've learnt that to pull a girl on the tube you shouldn't stand in front of her with your crotch in her face. All those missed opportunities.

Hey there baby...

2007-03-13T11:42:00.000Z

I should have been 25 in the 70s!

Afraid of WMA Steve?

2007-02-15T11:00:00.000Z

The boss of Apple asks the record industry to stop using digital rights management on their tracks. Everyone knows the reason ipods are so shit is because they will only play songs downloaded from itunes (DRM protected songs anyway). That means that anything downloaded from another website will not play on an ipod. People are turning away from itunes in droves as they can get cheaper songs elsewhere...but...shock horror, these songs are in Microsoft's DRMd format: WMA.

itunes and ipods can't play these files so people have stopped buying ipods.

The answer? Well, Steve Jobs wants record companies to drop DRM so that the WMA files downloaded from napster and the likes can be converted in itunes so that they can play on an ipod.

I think that's fear in them there eyes.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/6338603.stm

The best Guardian article ever...and very few spelling mistakes.

2007-02-06T13:56:00.000Z

This is for you Jim Bob!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,2006031,00.html

I especially like the fact that (at the time of writing) the web site is covered in adverts for the Mac (Guardian readers being as equally pretentious as the Apple Mac itself!).

"Some companies have no idea" or "Sony: you truly are shit!"

2007-01-13T12:33:00.000Z

Everyone knows that the increase in the amount of porn available on the Internet pretty much led to the Internet's success. Broadband connections would certainly not be as widespread if it wasn't for the interest in porn. I think it's quite safe to say that outside of 9-5 the majority of traffic on the Internet is porn related.

DVD can also attribute much of its early success to the porn industry - I remember a friend of mine (who was quite a technology geek) saying back in 2000 (when DVD was just starting to take off) that "the porn industry is pushing the boundaries of DVD technology". They were involved in the implementation of special features and multiple angles way before the major Hollywood studios.

So....now we hear that Sony has decided not to allow porn studios to use its new (possible DVD replacement) Blu-Ray discs. Having previously been a (quiet) supporter of the Sony format I now find myself leaning towards the HD format simply because this is the most ridiculously short minded company policy I've heard in a long time.

http://uk.gizmodo.com/2007/01/12/bluray_goes_limp_for_porn.html

Imagine a car company building a cheap and small but extremely fast car and then deciding not to allow anyone under 25 to buy it...

Not so down wid da kidz it would seem...

2006-12-14T12:54:00.000Z

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/6179573.stm

Hostel Staples

2006-12-07T23:16:00.001Z

Cockroaches are not as common as you might think...and you very rarely see a mouse....but you`ll always find a Japanese or Chinese guy travelling alone who is very content just to sit around talking to nobody and the American guy who thinks he can travel but is actually just spending his parents money and is quite frankly very rude...for example, the guy behind me: He`s watching films on his laptop...but whenever someone talks he puts the volume up - what`s more rude? To be talking to your mates in a room or to turn the volume up on a movie you`re watching on your own?

The mulled wine is very nice here.

Hostel Staples

2006-12-07T23:16:00.000Z

Bethan Taylor MA

2006-12-04T13:21:00.000Z

Congratulations Bethan!!

Council tax money well spent...

2006-11-29T10:37:00.000Z

Well, not really.

"Hello, Swiss cottage leisure centre"

"Hi, I would like to book a badminton court for Thursday at 8"

"Certainly sir, whats you membership number"

"Oh, I'm not a member, I was hoping to pay and play"

"Sorry sir, you need to be a member to book over the phone"

"Oh, that's rather inconvenient - How much is a membership"

"£39 per month and you need to come in and see a membership advisor"

"So living in the borough of Camden and paying Camden council tax doesn't guarantee me the use of a badminton court...even if I am willing to pay £10 for the privilege

"No sir. Thank you sir".

That's shit that is.

Long live the Booze Cruise

2006-11-23T13:36:00.000Z

See, normally this kind of news would annoy me, but seeing as so much fun can be had on a booze cruise (see evidence below) I think it's a shame that they would no longer have been needed!

Pics>
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bathers/sets/72157594376082970/

How Romantic!

2006-11-22T13:34:00.000Z

...or not...the guy isn't even a bloody sailor! He's a locksmith who dressed up as a sailor. How does that work? that's just cheesy!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/south_east/6170350.stm

"Scott Blauvelt is an American with a disability"

2006-10-12T10:04:00.000+01:00

He's in the office alone, he's had a long day...so why not get it all off his chest!

http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/10/11/prosecutor.indecency.ap/index.html

Surely it's not indecent if nobody else is there? (does a tree falling in a forest with nobody there to hear it make a noise?!).

Great minds think alike....

2006-10-09T18:04:00.000+01:00

We all wrote these pages at separate times (I think) and yet, for some reason, we seem to have all created pretty much the same intro:

Me - http://www.justgiving.com/garethbathers
"Well, it's that time of year again. Time to beat my (aherm) blistering time of 2 hours and 12 minutes from last year!"

Gaz Jones - http://www.justgiving.com/garethwynjones
"Well it's that time of year again and I've been persuaded(arm twisted) to run the Cardiff Half Marathon again."

Gaz Jones - http://www.justgiving.com/garethshaw
"It's that time of year again and muggins is running in the Cardiff half-marathon. I've actually done some training this time, so maybe I won't be limping for 2 months afterwards, but then again, maybe I will."

..Now get sponsoring us!

The oh so middle class BBC web site...

2006-10-02T12:30:00.000+01:00

Proof, if proof was ever actually needed, that the majority (I think it's safe to call 83.14% a majority) of people who read the BBC online web site are middle class....

http://newsvote.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/5398416.stm?dynamic_vote=ON#vote_5398818

Smarten Up...No work clothes!

2006-09-27T20:42:00.000+01:00

I assume this doesn't mean a suit?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/north_west/5385864.stm

Where did I leave my car K...9s..like keys, but K9. Get it? No, it's crap. I know.

2006-09-27T17:43:00.000+01:00

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/southern_counties/5382878.stm

"Ms Piesley said her dog George had eaten something, and realising it was the chip, he put the dog in the front seat and started the car with the key."

Free Hugs...

2006-09-26T20:16:00.000+01:00

Ah, how nice....There's not such thing as a stranger, just a friend you haven't met yet!

Bahh..Humbug. Balls to that shit.

UPDATE: Why can't I make something like this..

2006-09-22T13:37:00.000+01:00

Well, I tried and it was shite. Look how much I play with my beard!

The Lord told me to do it...

2006-09-22T13:28:00.000+01:00

Bullshit. Utter Bullshit. But funny though.

http://www.bcisgnet.co.uk/igo/page12.html

It all starts with:

"In May 1996, a Christian friend was visiting us for the launch of the Joshua Project and was attracted, by the Lord, to a large derelict property called the Puffin Hotel..."

And ends with:

"...We believe that there are still others that God is calling to get involved here in the work in very specific ways, and we are expecting that He will unfold His purposes in this respect over the coming days."

Why can't I make something like this!

2006-09-14T17:40:00.000+01:00

or this:

The most recent chance...

2006-09-09T22:25:00.000+01:00

Mt Etna has started spewing a bit of Lava in the past day…

http://keyetv.com/watercooler/local_story_251202204.html

Sadly, I don’t have the money (or the time) to get out to Siciliy to see this. Shame.

Picture from http://www.etnatrekking.com/webcam_b1/index.php (Etna Webcam).

See more progress on: see an active volcano

Betsy!!

2006-09-07T00:23:00.000+01:00

The newest member of BexySastards fording a river in Porsmork, Iceland.

Go girl!!

(Gaz Wedge is driving by the way)

soktelo

2006-09-01T21:44:00.000+01:00

Kick depressive thoughts out of your life!

You wona?t find more effective antibiotics anywhere!

Things you never expect people to say...

2006-08-18T12:56:00.000+01:00

"...and currently study Media Studies at London Metropolitan University- and hating it because it's so boring and a difficult course."

What?!!

http://www.myspace.com/grace_1987

Not the brightest, me thinks...

Yeah, I was looking up random girls, again....before you ask.

Monkey!! (another one)

2006-08-18T08:25:00.000+01:00

yup...all my blogs from now on are going to be youtube videos...

Gonna regret that in the morning...

2006-08-18T02:28:00.000+01:00

Just heard a couple having a fight outside the house. The guy used the best line ever...

...no, you need to get over yourself. You need to get over your chips....your dips...you need to get over yourself.

Once he'd finished his little speech, she walked off and he followed sheepishly behind...obviously got nowhere else to go. Poor Bastard's just screwed any chance he was gonna have of sex tonight. I pitty the fool.

------
>>Sent via mobile phone<<

'Bathers' without the 'S'

2006-08-16T22:45:00.000+01:00

Just had an e-mail from the lead singer of a band called "TheTechnical" (no, they're not big). Seems he's called "Luke Bather" or, to his mates; "Bather".

That's some weird shit that.

http://www.thetechnical.co.uk/

Jonesey and that Ironing Board

2006-08-15T20:32:00.000+01:00

The (in)famous moment put to music....

Dirty Version

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Romantic Version

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Dtrunken Texts

2006-08-11T12:13:00.000+01:00

of too. I've won no money and am drunk. At

Fuck simp.

and..

many siemeies.

Ever Onward IBM...

2006-08-10T16:46:00.000+01:00

Without giving anything away about who I work for...

http://barry_froggatt.users.btopenworld.com/songbook.html

How good is that? I think they should bring it back!

My personal favourites...

TO OUR I. B. M. BOARD OF DIRECTORS
Tune: "Glory, Glory, Hallelujah"

1. Our I. B. M. Directors are all great commercial men;
They’re U. S. A.’s financial kings of learned acumen.
They give us their experience and untiring efforts when
They’re serving the I. B. M.

2. Their wisdom in directing this world service Company
Is yielding benefits to all and our prosperity.
Our I. B. M. promotes good-will and sterling honesty
For all Humanity.

Chorus
Here’s to I. B. M.’s Directors,
And our many fine Stockholders.
International Peace Promoters,
Now known as I. B. M.

TO OUR I. B. M. GIRLS
Tune: "They’re Style All the While"

The office girls surely are always in style,
They greet you with smiles, their welcome’s worth while.
The best in the world are our girls, rank and file,
They’re style all the while - all the while.

They’ve made our I. B. M. complete and worth while,
They work and they smile-so sweetly they smile;
Tall, short, thin and stout girls-they win by a mile -
With heavenly styles all the while.

OUR PRESIDENT'S MOTTO: "THINK"
Tune: "Yankee Doodle"

1. T-H-I-N-K spells THINK --
Our President Watson's motto.
It saves mistakes, lost time and ink.
You'll then do what you ought to.

2. T-H-I-N-K is THINKI
'Tis good for brain and body,
Then dark blue visions change to pink.
And you'll please everybody.

Chorus
T-H-I-N-K that's THINK --
Get ideas big and wholesome;
And you'll not be the missing link,
You'll learn from Mr. Watson.

The difference between the UK and Italy

2006-08-10T15:31:00.000+01:00

British advert:

Italian advert:

It's the Airlines Fault!

2006-08-10T10:40:00.000+01:00

Well, no. It isn't. Your holiday may be ruined, but big fucking deal. The police have just foiled an attempt to blow up planes...a plane you could have bloody well been on!

Why must the British people always grumble about this shit.

"There are babies crying. Nobody is telling us anything". Bla bla ba. Get a life.

You ungrateful little shits.

I hope I drown or get blown up...

2006-08-04T10:51:00.000+01:00

Why the hell would I want to be embalmed?

Look at this...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Embalming

Not only am I dead, but some guy gets to wash me down and play with my dead skin to get me to look "normal". I'm dead, the last thing I want is to look like I'm not dead.

If I never get around to writing a will, I hope someone reads this and realises that I do not want to be embalmed or displayed or anything. When I die, I want to be cremated straight away. No embalming, no displays, nothing.

Sometimes I look around me and realise that we really are not as 'developed' as we think we are! What's with this fascination with retaining all sorts of stupid 'traditions'....Like embalming, fox hunting and the worst of all...Religion!

Chaaaaav!!

2006-08-03T18:24:00.000+01:00

Welsh Chavs are the best. Look at this guy...

http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=14564020

I love his "favourite drinks"..."Stella Artois, Kronenburg, Grolsh and Strongbow".

6 days on gadgets

2006-08-03T14:16:00.000+01:00

Seems I've managed to spend 6 days worth of pay on gadgets from www.ebuyer.co.uk in the last year.

That includes a monitor and digi camera (yes, another one). This one is waterproof and unbreakable tho, so should last longer than the usual ones.

Bolivia Bug

2006-08-02T20:48:00.000+01:00

My second favourite thing about this video is that the caption for it give by the poster is "This is a caterpillar that Andrew found on the patio. When you touch it, it rolls up into a ball. He says it is a "Puss" caterpillar. God is astounding in the variety he put into creation". Which is obviously bullshit. But I like to be angered in this way.

The best thing, however, is this response...great stuff (you need the volume on)

Ghostbusters!

2006-07-27T14:04:00.000+01:00

Ghostbusters comign through the smoke....

What have i learnt today?

2006-07-12T19:24:00.000+01:00

I've learnt that when you drop a bog roll while wiping you shouldn't try to catch it, you should let it fall. In fact, i don't think i learnt it today, i merely realised that i already knew this. Well, my body seemed to know it, anyway. At first i thought i let the roll out of laziness. I knew that i could simply pick it up from the floor so why bother trying to fumble after it. But then i realised. If i tried to catch it as it fell, chances are i would keep hold of the loose end of the paper and as it fell and rolled along the floor it would unravel itself. By letting it go my body seemed to know that this would simply cause it to fall to the floor and roll along the floor without shedding paper. This saves me having to try to roll the paper back on - an impossible task, i'm sure you'll agree.

So, it wasn't laziness that made me give up trying to catch it, it was common sense.

Now, not putting the roll on the holder in the first place...that was lazy.

------
>>Sent via mobile phone<<

Well....that was interesting...

2006-07-11T12:57:00.000+01:00

Seems someone figured out how to send pictures to my flickr account..which in turn sent items to my blog. Good old internet security. Can't beat it!

Yahoo - sort your shit out!

Some of them were actually quite funny..but taking up too much space. oh well.

A day out in the park

2006-06-26T13:06:00.000+01:00

Just been sat in regent's park, which as always, is amazing. But i can't help but get annoyed at the fact that most of the people seem to have got here by car!

------
>>Sent via mobile phone<<

The ig-nobles

2006-06-16T16:05:00.000+01:00

The best awards in the world...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Ig_Nobel_Prize_winners

And possibly the best patent in the world:
http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?Sect1=PTO1&Sect2=HITOFF&d=PALL&p=1&u=%2Fnetahtml%2FPTO%2Fsrchnum.htm&r=1&f=G&l=50&s1=4,022,227.PN.&OS=PN/4,022,227&RS=PN/4,022,227

Like this is going help...

2006-06-07T10:18:00.000+01:00

It is normal to be suspicious of anyone or any group of people who fail to integrate into society. If all muslims suddenyl stop co-operating with the police it is extremely unlikely that the police will now feel the need to respect them...it's only going to make the police even more suspicious of them.

The majority of muslim people (and other people) have nothing to hide so why hide it!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/5054600.stm

Wide boys....

2006-06-02T11:20:00.000+01:00

Can't believe it's taken me this long to post this picture. This was taken at Erotica 2005....

I love the way Mike was taking it so seriously. You'd think he was having his photo taken next to the Taj Mahal or at a prize giving ceremony. The poor lad was awfully excited though.

Click on the photo for the not so clean version...

For all those dirty pervs doing a search for pictures of her, this is Linsey Dawn McKensie. Not that you would want to look for pictures of her. She's a right munt.

Brits download the most porn...

2006-06-02T09:20:00.000+01:00

...If this was measured by volume, then I dread to think what percentage of the total figure I'm responsible for...

http://uk.gizmodo.com/2006/05/31/british_men_love_porn.html#more

Creationism...Take a bit of that!

2006-06-01T17:50:00.000+01:00

I assume god was bored when he decided to build an underwater cave and fill it with weird and wonderful creatures that we'd never seen before?

Strange as it may seem, the theory of evolution explains this situation far better than any other theory...

(it's stranger still to believe that there might be some almighty creator out there building everything. That's the one major flaw with creationism and religion...If you take a step back and look at it sensibly you realise it's all...Well...bollocks).

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/5036618.stm

Since when is wanking sex?

2006-05-27T09:45:00.000+01:00

Here is another example of "sensationalist" media reporting from the US. People are apparently looking up porn on the net and 'pleasuring themselves' (which is apparently "sex", according to this reporter). My favourite bit is where they pan from the video footage of the guy frastically masturbating to the sign for the "children's section" and then ask they guy if he would let his kids in the library if he knew that masturbaters were in there. It seems that men who masturbate are a risk to children. That makes 99.9% of men a risk to children (The 0.1% are those with no arms or cocks and stuff).

http://www.break.com/index/libraryjerk.html

Drunk or stoned.

2006-05-24T23:23:00.000+01:00

...is a new call in show on late night virgin radio. Part of the geoff show (one half of the team that used to do the breakfast show). Not sure how ethical it is, but it's bloody funny. On past my bed time these days tho sadly.

------
>>Sent via mobile phone<<

Those Yanks are at it again...

2006-05-17T21:20:00.000+01:00

I could spend my whole life laughing at those knobs.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/05/17/unmarried.ap/index.html

One day I'm going to actually write something on this blog rather than just linking to something. But the links tend to speak for themselves. If only some Americans would learn to think for themselves.

I'm a millionaire!!

2006-05-17T09:58:00.000+01:00

Feel I need to add this - THIS IS NOT REAL! IF YOU GET SENT ONE OF THESE E-MAILS DELETE IT (READ IT FIRST, IT'S FUNNY) BUT YOU ARE NOT (I REPEATE, NOT!) A MILLIONAIRE!

CLICK ON THE AAL LOGO TO ENTER SITE

ANGLO AMERICAN INTERNATIONAL LOTTERY

Headquarters Anglo American Campus Thames Valley

Park Reading RG6 1WG England

Customer Service: 580 NCA 85914

Ref: EAASL/941OYI/04

Batch: 12/27/Du34

RESULTS FOR CATEGORY "A" DRAW

Congratulations to you as we bring to your notice, the results of the First Category draws of ANGLO AMERICAN INTERNET LOTTERY PROMOTIONAL INTERNATIONAL.

CONGRATULATIONS WINNING NOTIFICATION

Dear Winner,

We happily announce to you the draw of the Anglo American internet promotional international E-Lottery held On the 17^th May 2006 in Essex United Kingdom. Your e-mail address attached to ticket number: B9564 75604545 188 with! Serial number 97560 drew the winning lucky number: 02/15/20/24/32/47/Bonus Ball(29) which subsequently won you the lottery in the first category.

You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of uk £ 200.000.000.00 (Two million Pounds) in cash credited to file KPC/9080118308/02.This is from a total cash prize of uk £13,000,000,00( Million Pounds , shared among the(13)lucky winners in this category world-wide.

Please note that your lucky winning number falls within our promotional international Lottery representative office in South Africa as indicated in your coupon. In view of this your,uk £ 200.000.000.00 (Two million Pounds)would be released to you by Our paying bank in African ,our agent will immediately commence the process to facilitate the release of your funds as soon as you contact him.

All participants were selected randomly from World Wide Web site through computer draws system and extracted from over 20,000,000,00 companies and individuals email addresses allover the world.

Be informed that the ANGLO AMEICAN INTERNET PROMOTION Chapter is a promotion aimed at internet globalization before the year 2010, thereby empowering internet literacy with its headquarters in London - United Kingdom.

This promotion takes place annually. For security reasons, you are advised to keep your winning information confidential till your claims is processed and your money remitted to your nominated bank account.

This is part of our precautionary measure to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program by some unscrupulous elements.

To file for your claim ,contact our corresponding agent in South Africa immediately you read this message via telephone or email address below.

contact information is as follow:

*******************************************************************
Mr.Mike Vuyo.

Accredited Agent Lottery Agent
ADDRESS: Lotteries Headquarters: 31, Brixon Court,
Carlton East Gate,Johannesburg 2191 South Africa.
Hot line: +27 73 119 1086
FAX : +27 11 507 6813
Email: info11claim@yahoo.com
********************************************************************

You are advised to contact the agents fiduciary via Telephone for notification as soon as you send your information.

NOTE: For easy reference and identification, find below your Reference and Batch numbers. Remember to quote these numbers in your correspondence with your claims fiduciary.

REFERENCE NUMBER: LSLUK/2031/8161/04

BATCH NUMBER: 14/011/IPD

Sincerely
Mrs.Mariska Nowak.
Online promotion coordinator

Sir. Steve Ballmer .
Chief Executive Officer, AAL Corporation

Congratulations from the Staffs & Members of the AAL International Lottery Board Commission

Mrs.Mariska Nowak. Dr.Peter W. Alexandra Sir. Steve Ballmer
(UKOnline Co-ordinator Sec.) (Zonal Co-ordinator RSA.) (CEO.AAL.Corporation.)

All rights reserved. Terms of Service - Guideline

100860 8556 2548 9576ZA

In case you're wondering - Steve Ballmer is CEO of Microsoft (and that isn't a picture of him).

It's probably going to be shit...

2006-05-16T19:12:00.000+01:00

..But I can't bloody wait to see this film.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/4987116.stm

Alex Baldwin?

2006-05-15T11:50:00.000+01:00

The look alikes are so good that one even looks like Alex Baldwin (one of the unknown Baldwins or possibly a spelling error?).

http://www.lookalikes-susanscott.co.uk/Menu%20Pages%2003/Hollywood/Hollywood03/alexbaldwinph.htm

Main web site: http://www.lookalikes-susanscott.co.uk/Menu%20lists%2003/hollywood.htm

Did anyone ever tell you you look like Angelina Jolie?

2006-05-15T11:48:00.000+01:00

Well, apparently someone told this girl. I think they were probably lying.

http://www.lookalikes-susanscott.co.uk/Menu%20Pages%2003/Hollywood/Hollywood05/AngelinaJolield.htm

(Don't ask how I found this...it wasn't how you might think!)

And I thought I was down wid da kidz!

2006-05-15T10:47:00.000+01:00

Only in America could a governor make such a fool of himself and seemingly get away with it. He's even quoted as saying "06 seniors rule."

Rocky on Sonny!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060514/ap_on_re_us/governor_s_post_prom

First it was the Tango slap...now we're seeing the streets attacked by fruit!

2006-05-12T18:57:00.000+01:00

Join the campaign to stop the fruit flingers. It's an absolute disgrace! These big companies from London think they can just waltz into some small pat of Swansea and cause all this damage! Well...the people of Swansea are fighting back!

http://www.swansea-res.org.uk

Yes, it is a joke.

Cookies are a sometimes food!

2006-05-10T16:31:00.000+01:00

Can't believe I missed this article last year. Seems even the cookie monster can't avoid the goodie goodie police. Although I do object to the fact that the cookie monster is quite clearly a biscuit monster, rather than a monster who solely eats the cookie variety of biscuits, I'm pretty peeved that he can no longer eat as much as he likes. What's he going to do now? Scoff down several bananas and a load of oranges...teaching kids that it's ok to have the shits all the time.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/tv_and_radio/4432415.stm

I'm thinking of starting a new diet plan. You can eat whatever you like, but you have to eat standing.

Although...balls....it's not a good idea apparently..
http://spirituality.indiatimes.com/articleshow/184616.cms

Shit, it's also against the wishes of our Lord Faithful, Allah:
http://www.islamweb.net/ver2/Fatwa/ShowFatwa.php?lang=E&Id=2156&Option=FatwaId

It's ok though - it's not a sin, it's just "better not to do it".

Jesus!

(Ah, the irony).

A text from Batman himself....

2006-05-08T11:18:00.000+01:00

Picture 268, originally uploaded by Gareth Bathers.

Pure genius:

"Just seen catherine's new bird. Phooar! 18 yrs old and fit! Also seen an even fitter norwegian quick fit fitter. I love lezzers."

Bathers' Blog

Get a life you idiots

Movember Day 17

Movember Day 16

Movember Day 15

Movember Day 14

Movember Day 13

Movember Day 12

Movember Day 11

Movember Day 10

Movember Day 9

Movember Day 8

Movember Day 7

Movember Day 6

Movember Day 5

Movember Day 4

Movember Day 3

Movember Day 2

Movember Day 1

Interest rates down to 0.5%?

Day 4

Day 2

What?

BBC NEWS | UK | 'No God' campaign draws complaint

God doesn't exist. Legally anyway

Call for creationism in science AKA Bullshit talked by twat taken seriously by idiots.

Linux?

DJs criticised for drink comments or "Billy-no-mates researcher does research into crap because nobody will invite them out for drinks".

BBC flights spending 'frivolous'

Who needs the Isle of Wight Festival anyway!

Beer up 4p a pint?

Who ya gonna call?

Worst train station in the world...

Lighter Nights

Blimey!

Understand the English language?

What's this you just sent me?

Always the pessimist...

Chef's salty balls...

The award for stupid bint of the month goes to

Save our Boozers!!

Test

NEWS!!!!

I could probably do this

How to sort your life out...

Hey there baby...

Afraid of WMA Steve?

The best Guardian article ever...and very few spelling mistakes.

"Some companies have no idea" or "Sony: you truly are shit!"

Not so down wid da kidz it would seem...

Hostel Staples

Hostel Staples

Bethan Taylor MA

Council tax money well spent...

Long live the Booze Cruise

How Romantic!

"Scott Blauvelt is an American with a disability"

Great minds think alike....

The oh so middle class BBC web site...

Smarten Up...No work clothes!

Where did I leave my car K...9s..like keys, but K9. Get it? No, it's crap. I know.

Free Hugs...

UPDATE: Why can't I make something like this..

The Lord told me to do it...

Why can't I make something like this!

The most recent chance...

Betsy!!

soktelo

Things you never expect people to say...

Monkey!! (another one)

Gonna regret that in the morning...

'Bathers' without the 'S'

Jonesey and *that* Ironing Board

Dtrunken Texts

Ever Onward IBM...

The difference between the UK and Italy

It's the Airlines Fault!

I hope I drown or get blown up...

Chaaaaav!!

6 days on gadgets

Jonesey and that Ironing Board