Monday, October 25, 2004

Lets replace fox hunting with....

Everyone's talking about chavs at the moment. This kind of pisses me off, because it means that at some point the chavs themselves are going to get wind of it and start changing their ways (although, this is unlikely, as they're all thick as pig shit and won't know what's going on). There might even be an increase in the sale of burberry and sovereign rings as chavs see them in the media and think they're adverts.

Anyway, I suggest you check out the chav section of www.fat-pie.com as there are some great video interviews on there.

Also, I have a suggestion for the government. I don't agree with fox hunting, and it seems that neither does most of the country. But I do admit that maybe it's a bit unfair on the people who make a living out of it...so I suggest replacing fox hunting with 'chav hunting'. We could all dress up in red coats and ride horses through the council estates of Newcastle, Rhyl and Shadwell (etc) shooting any chav we saw. Obviously we couldn't do this all year (we might run out of chavs) so we would need a 'season' - I suggest spring time, as this would mean that there are less chavs around for the summer tourist season. The chavs would get a right of appeal, naturally, but this would have to be lodged before the 'hunting season'. During the hunting season all chavs would be fair game. There might be a problem with chavs wearing disguises during the hunting season, but this could be avoided by simply not mentioning 'chav hunting' in the common media (The Sun, The Star, ITV for example). There may be a problem of some of them carrying weapons (flick knives, knuckle dusters etc) but this would only add to the excitement of the hunt.

Any money raised from the event (BBC television rights, advertising etc) could then be ploughed back into the worst affected areas "to give something back". The money could be spent on building better roads (also improves access for next years hunt) and building more 'green spaces' (nicer for the hunters horses) and improving the transport infrastructure (more buses = more bus shelters!).

Just think of the amount of money it would save the economy in terms of reduced benefit payments, lower NHS costs and vastly reduced GP waiting lists (the reason doctors sometimes miss-diagnose things is because so many chavs go to the doctors for no bloody reason. "Kylie's cryin, I fink it's meningitis").

2 comments:

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Anonymous said...

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